Many people make the mistake of constantly complaining, thinking that by reminding their partner of their faults, they will eventually get things right. WRONG. Remember a time when you had a really bad headache and you kept complaining about it? Did this get rid of the pain? No. Unless you took some medication to remedy it, you would not have felt better. Now this concept holds true for relationships as well; anything that goes wrong cannot be made right simply by complaining. You need to seek a solution.
Make the Move
If you notice that your partner seems aloof, telling this person about it over and over again will not change things. In fact, it might just make the situation worse. What you can do is to reach out and communicate. There might be something that is really bothering your partner which is why he is distancing himself from you. Find out what is going on and discuss how you can fix it.
In your thoughts, words, and acts, always do your best to remain positive. Think about the bright side of things. If you are upset because your partner is often glued on the tube all evening, be grateful that he is not out partying with friends, or even worse, partying in the company of women. Serve some popcorn and beer and watch TV with him instead of complaining.
If your partner is doing something you dislike, talk to him about it but not in a blaming way of course. Tell him why you dislike it and discuss possible fixes. For example, if you dislike it when your partner forgets to pick up the laundry, explain why. Avoid becoming emotionally charged during the conversation; compromise if you have to. Open communication is better than simply complaining and nagging your partner about his faults.
In the same way, also ask your partner about what he likes and what he does not like. Maybe he has a good explanation as to why he always forgets to pick up the laundry. By finding out the “why’s,” you can work on the “how’s” thereby paving the way for a more solid relationship.
Relationships need time and effort to grow. If you want yours to blossom and improve, be more proactive, develop open communication, and always be positive. If you can maintain these things, you should have no problem at all when it comes to keeping your relationship solid and strong.